Just My Two Cents: A Conversation With Jesus

I just got a link from twitter via cherokee_autumn. The post is a pretend conversation with Jesus over the phone. The point seems to be against those who are against health care reform but the writer also takes the opportunity to make potshots against Jesus and Christianity. The politics expressed cause no problems for me because I agree that it is wrong not to help people who do not have health care. I have issue with the comments made about the Bible and the equating of final judgment of sin with "death panels". I'm sure the author would agree that "death panels" are no where in Obama's Medical Reform plan, but it should also be said that they are not in the Bible either.
Here are some quotes from the post and my comments.

Jesus: Well, you see I had these 12 guys I was hanging out with when I was there. I thought they had learned my teachings well enough to put it on paper myself. We didn't plan on them inserting their thoughts and miscalculations into the Word of God. We still let these guys into heaven when they died, but they don't get full privileges here.

I'd like to see some proof that the New Testament writers inserted their own thought and miscalculations. This is an unfounded assertion and not something Jesus would say, given what He is recorded to have said. In order that Jesus' apostles messed up, I would like to see examples of the writers putting falsifiable lies and contradicting each other. It can't be provided because there are no examples

Me: Rumor has it that when you were here last time that you cured the sick and raised people from the dead. How much did you profit from doing that?

Jesus: You don't make a profit for that sort of thing. A true Christian wants to hang out with healthy people and help those who aren't healthy back to health. Christians want to take care of each other and not profit off the misfortunes of others.

Me: We have an entire industry here dedicated to profiting off of the misfortunes of others though. What do you think of that?

Jesus: We have a special place for them when they pass on. Let's just say they'll never need a winter coat and leave it like that.

Now on this point, we mostly agree. Jesus would not condone making profit off the misfortune of others. He preached against such evil taking place when He was ministering on person. He hang out with the sick, the destitute, and the people who needed help. As Christians we are supposed to do the same thing. I admit that we can all do better following the examples Jesus lived, but that doesn't make Jesus' teachings any less true. Look at what the Master said and did:

When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, "Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and 'sinners'?"
On hearing this, Jesus said, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice.' For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners." - Matthew 9:11-13

At that very time Jesus cured many who had diseases, sicknesses and evil spirits, and gave sight to many who were blind. So he replied to the messengers, "Go back and report to John what you have seen and heard: The blind receive sight, the lame walk, those who have leprosy[a] are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the good news is preached to the poor. Blessed is the man who does not fall away on account of me." Luke 7:21-23

Here is the quotes from the post equating the imaginary "death panels" with final judgement in heaven.

Me: We've been debating health care reform down here lately. We've got loony tunes on the right lying and deceiving the public about it. We've got politicians talking about imaginary death panels, scaring our older citizens. Any thoughts on that?

Jesus: Just one. There is definitely a death panel. Make no mistake about that. And when these lying, deceiving, and pathetic scare mongers do die I'm at the head of the death panel. I decide on everlasting life, and you can count them out.

Me: So have you seen those domestic terrorists carrying guns around town hall meetings trying to intimidate people on health care reform?

Jesus: Definitely. Honestly, you've got to put a halt to those things. You've got the right party in control now, just get it done. What you people don't understand is how angry my Dad got the first time he saw a spawn of Satan armed at one of those. It took all of my persuasive power to talk him out of sending a bolt of lightening down there to tickle that idiot's ass. I try now to keep Dad preoccupied with other matters whenever a town hall is scheduled now.

Me: So, another example of people who don't need to pack for cold weather when they die, huh?

Jesus: No, definitely going to be plenty warm where people like that are heading. Listen, I have to run. I'm about ready to convene another death panel here myself and it looks like there's quite a crowd to judge today. We'll chat again some day.

There is no doubt in my mind that we should stand against those who are lying about the "death panels". I think that we should recognize that we are already at that point. This is why reform is needed. We are already at the point that a panel sits around in an insurance company and decides what medical procedures they will pay for and what they will not. I know of no better example of a death panel. If you have money, you get the best medical care. If you don't have money they will let you die. We are already there. I don't think for a second that is pleasing to God.

As for who is going to hell, I do think that those who are pushing these evil things are wrong and will be punished. Jesus' final judgment is like a death panel where your works and actions and worth are judged and if you measure up you live. No. Judgment has already been rendered and falls on all of us. None of us deserve life. It's a gift from God. .

This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood. He did this to demonstrate his justice, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished—he did it to demonstrate his justice at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus. - Romans 3:22-26

If you were really to have a conversation with Jesus He would say:

Thomas said to him, "Lord, we don't know where you are going, so how can we know the way?"
Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you really knew me, you would know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him." - John 14:5-7

Just My Two Cents: A Conversation With Jesus